1.4 Ethnic jokes

Ethnic humor is particular to a certain ethnic group or culture and may or may not be the same as an ethnic joke. An ethnic joke relies for humorous effect on peculiarities of a particular ethnicity, real or imaginary. Many of them rely on stereotypes about particular ethnicities, often those from different (neighbour) nations or minorities. For example Finns tell jokes about Swedes and Gypsies. Sometimes they are considered in good taste, meant to poke fun at or about another culture, while other times they are considered offensive or racist. Sometimes the difference between the two judgements is in the nature of the joke itself, and sometimes the difference is in the perception of those hearing it.

In an attempt to preserve the humor of ethnic jokes without their derogatory nature, on rare occasions such jokes are told with the word ethnic or some variant in place of the nationality of the subject. For example: "Two ethnics are out duck hunting. They hunt and hunt and hunt and still have not killed one duck. Finally, ethnic #1 says to ethnic #2: 'Maybe we'd do better if we threw the dog up higher.' " Another twist is letting people of that same target group enjoy a monopoly on telling jokes about themselves.

Many ethnic jokes appear in several cultures with nothing changed except the group being disparaged. For example, many American jokes about Poles, Canadian jokes about Newfoundlanders, British jokes about the Irish, and Indian jokes about Sikhs are identical except for the ethnic group which is the subject of the joke.

A traditional British form of ethnic joke starts "An Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman … " and may go on to make fun of any of the three by comparison with the other two.

Examples

• An old gypsy goes to his local council and says, "My wife has become ill, and we need to come off the road. Can we have a council house?"

• A Nubian crawls across Sahara and sees a magic bottle. He opened the bottle and a djinni came out. As djinn usually do, this one promised three wishes to the man who got him free. The Nubian thought for a moment and answered: "First, I want plenty of water, second, I'd like to be totally white, and third I want plenty of white women of all European nations on top of me." The man was turned into a flush toilet in a ladies' restroom at the EU headquarters.

• How do you kill 5,000 Ukrainians at once? Plant mushrooms on the freeway.

• What was the dirtiest fight ever fought? An Icelander and a seagull fighting on a beach over a rotten fish.

• How do you make twelve Jews/ Ukrainians get into a Volkswagen/ Zaporozhets? Throw a penny/ ten kopeck into the backseat.

See also: Newfie, Molbo story,

1.5 Yo' mama jokes

Main articles: Playing the dozens and Your mom.

Jokes of this kind originate in the dozens, an African-American custom with West African roots in which two competitors -- usually males -- go head to head in a competition of comedic trash talk. The target of the traded insults is most often the opponents' mothers, but can involve other family members, as well.

Jokes of this kind are known in other cultures. While verbal contests are known around the world, the very specific form of insulting your mom is thought to be derived from "the dozens".

1.6 Political jokes

Political jokes tell about politicians and heads of states.

Examples

• A child, an honest politician, and Santa Claus all spot a $20 bill on the ground. Who picks it up? The child, since the other two don't exist.

• Bush approved of a new method of testing ready-to-eat meat for the potentially lethal Listeria bacteria found in factories. According to the legislation, ready-to-eat meat will have to pass standardized tests as part of Bush's "leave no hot dog behind" campaign.

• A couple are touring a graveyard when they spot a tombstone that reads "Here lies an honest man and a politician." The man says to the woman, "Look honey, there's two people in that grave."

• Politician X is lying so much, other politicians have started to notice.

See also: You have two cows

1.7 Question - answer

Often posed as a common riddle, the answer is twisted humorously.

Q: What is black and white and read all over?

A1: A newspaper. (The common riddle answer.)

A2: A bleeding xxx. (xxx can be a penquin, nun, any likely wearer of a tuxedo, etc.)

Of this type are knock-knock joke, lightbulb joke, grape joke, Radio Yerevan, and some jokes of other types described here.

1.7.1 Why did the chicken cross the road?

• Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

Although perhaps the most famous of all jokes in the English language, this joke is a Non-joke, in that its humor value comes from the fact that it is expected to be funny. Additionally, it is rarely told on its own, but it is referenced, modified, or parodied in a number of other jokes.

• Why did the tachyon cross the road? Because it was on the other side.

• Why did the chicken cross the Möbius strip? To get to the same side.

• Why did the chicken cross the road in Texas? To show the armadillo it could be done.

1.7.2 Elephant jokes

Usually a riddle of the form "Why did the elephant...?", where the answer is ridiculously impossible.

Examples

• Why did the elephant cross the road? Because it was stapled to the chicken.
• How do you tell when an elephant gets into your refrigerator? By his footprints in the butter.
• How do you hide an elephant in a strawberry patch? Paint its toenails red.
  • How can you know this works? Have you ever seen an elephant in a strawberry patch?
• How does an elephant ask for a bun? (while waving either arm in a trunk-like manner) "give us a bun!"

1.7.3 Dead baby jokes

A subgenre of jokes derives their humor simply from violating taboos and being so blatantly offensive in their subject matter that (for some) the situation becomes funny, not macabre. A staple of these jokes and the source of the name is dead babies, a subject which would usually be considered the opposite of "funny." A fair number of the jokes are derivations of each other, told in sequence for maximum effect. Others derive their humor from the implication that the teller knows from personal experience. These sorts typically work best in a verbal rather than a written context.

Examples

• How do you get 1000 dead babies into a phone booth? Use a blender.
• How do you get 1000 dead babies out of a phone booth? Nachos!
• How do you make a dead baby float? A glass of root beer, two scoops of ice cream, and a scoop of dead baby.
• How many dead babies does it take to paint a house? It depends on how hard you throw them.

1.8 Profession-targeted jokes

These target the perceived flaws of people in certain trades. Lawyer jokes are traditionally popular in the United States.

Example

• You find yourself stuck in a hole with a murderer, a rapist, and a lawyer. You're armed but you only have 2 bullets left, what do you do? Shoot the lawyer twice.

Italians trade jokes about the Carabinieri national police force, and this fact is rather good-humouredly acknowledged even in the force's own website, probably because the Carabinieri know that, jokes aside, they do enjoy a high degree of respect. Carabinieri are factually known to be occasionally willing to tell a few such jokes themselves. It is also known that they have a small office in Rome devoted to tracking, developing and collecting jokes (but this is a joke).

Example

• Our officers, eager to keep their patrol cars clean, will capsize them at the end of every shift in order to empty the ashtray. (Adapted from the official Carabinieri website).

1.9 Shaggy dog stories

A shaggy dog story is an extremely long and involved joke with a weak or completely nonexistent punchline. The humor lies in building up the audience's anticipation and then letting them down completely.

Shaggy jokes appear to date from the 1930s, although there are several competing variants for the "original" shaggy dog story. According to one, an advertisement is placed in a newspaper, searching for the shaggiest dog in the world. The teller of the joke then relates the story of the search for the shaggiest dog in extreme and exaggerated detail (flying around the world, climbing mountains, fending off sabre-toothed tigers, etc); a good teller will be able to stretch the story out to over half an hour. When the winning dog is finally presented, the advertiser takes a look at the dog and states: "I don't think he's so shaggy".

1.10 You have two cows

A large number of jokes, beginning " You have two cows...", describe what would be done with the cows under a certain political or economic system. The jokes satirize many countries, television shows, religions, and systems, especially bureaucracy, communism, and capitalism.

Examples

• Canadianism: You have two cows. Vous avez deux vaches.
• Communism--Reality: You have two cows. Technically, everyone owns all the cows and everyone is equal. If you happen to be in charge of everyone and their cows, you own more of the cows than everyone else because you are more equal than they are.
• Democracy: You have two cows. They outvote you 2-1 to ban all meat and dairy products.
• Dictatorship: You have two cows. The government takes both and shoots you.
• Dyslexia: You have two woks.
• Political Correctness: You are associated with (the concept of "ownership" is a symbol of the phallocentric, war-mongering, intolerant past) two differently-aged (but no less valuable to society) bovines of non-specified gender.
• Totalitarianism: You have two cows. The government takes them and denies they ever existed. Milk is banned.

1.11 Other classes of jokes

• Administratium
• Drummer joke
• Grape joke
• In Soviet Russia
• Knock-knock joke
• Meta-joke
• Lightbulb joke
• Russian joke
• Bad jokes and other deleted nonsense
• You have two cows

2 Related articles

Internet humor, insult, comedy, jester, punch line, world's funniest joke,

Jokes

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